As children grow older, they may develop strong opinions about where they want to live, how much time they want to spend with each parent, or how an existing parenting schedule is working.

California family courts can consider a child’s preferences when deciding custody and visitation. But a child’s preference is not automatically the final decision. The court must still determine custody according to the applicable best-interest standards while considering the child’s age, capacity, maturity, and circumstances.

Age Is Important, but It Is Not the Only Factor

California law provides that when a child is of sufficient age and capacity to form an intelligent preference regarding custody, the court must consider and give due weight to the child’s wishes.

That does not create a specific age at which a child simply gets to choose which parent to live with.

The child’s maturity and reasoning can matter as much as chronological age. California authority has recognized the preferences of children younger than 14 when they demonstrated sufficient maturity, while also recognizing circumstances where an older child’s preference was not supported by mature reasoning.

This is why statements such as “the child can choose at 14” oversimplify California custody law.

Children 14 and Older Have Additional Rights to Address the Court

California does establish an important rule for children who are at least 14.

When a child age 14 or older wants to address the court regarding custody or visitation preferences, the court must receive the child’s testimony unless it determines that doing so would not be in the child’s best interest. If the court reaches that conclusion, it must state its reasons on the record.

A child under 14 can also potentially address the court when the court determines that doing so is in the child’s best interest.

Importantly, California does not require a child to state a custody preference simply because the child is old enough to do so.

Children Do Not Necessarily Testify in Front of Their Parents

California recognizes that directly discussing parental preferences can place significant pressure on a child.

The court generally may not have a child address the court about custody or visitation in the presence of the parents unless it determines that doing so is in the child’s best interest and explains that decision on the record.

California procedures provide alternatives for obtaining the child’s input while attempting to protect the child and preserve the parties’ rights concerning the evidence considered by the court.

A Child’s Preference Is Input, Not an Automatic Custody Order

A child’s wishes can be meaningful evidence, particularly when the child has sufficient maturity to explain the preference intelligently.

But custody decisions remain the responsibility of the family court.

Parents should therefore avoid placing children in the position of believing they must “choose” between them. California’s approach is designed to give children an appropriate voice while protecting them from unnecessary involvement in parental litigation.